NETHER PORTALS AND FARMING | Roach Plays Minecraft (The Squad)


(exhales) – It’s getting a bit blustery
out here in Roach Town! But don’t worry, Roaches,
I’ve got a steaming mug of hot cocoa and a nice
session of “Minecraft” to warm you up this December! You guys remember my totally
uggo wood house, right? Chateau Roach, anybody? Huh, it’s getting a
little cramped in here. No worries! Okay, diamond pickaxe,
let’s do some exploring! (footsteps) Whoa, this place goes down forever! A tunnel to the abyss. Oh, spooky. Gimme that iron! Yum-yum-yum. (taps) (screams) Who turned off the lights? Ah, my sweet sleepy little village, I’ll take some water please! Oh, pretty sunset! All right, now that
I’ve got some supplies, it’s time to make a little farm. A little Roaching farm! Just like Granpapi. (sighs) He’d be so proud of me! – That garden looks like garbage, boy! – Ah, water, the nectar of life! (water splashes) Well, I’m tired! It’s bedtime! See you in the morning, Roaches! (snores) – Good morning! – Well, I see a little zombie tried to scare me in the night! Too bad, sir, you’re all ashes now! (zombie grunts) Okay, some more water for my farm. (zombie grunts) ♪ Planting some wheat,
planting some wheat ♪ (zombie growls) Not now, zombie, I’m busy! I don’t have time to put out your fire! (door taps) (villager mumbles)
Whoa, what? Are the villagers okay? (footsteps) Oh hey, Mister Cow! You better not be eating
all my wheat seeds. I worked very hard on these! These woods are gorgeous! Man, I’d love to take Caroline
and Anya out here sometime. I’m sure they’d get a kick
out of those mushrooms! Nobody’s home. Back to the caves! Oh, lava! You guys know what that means! (splashes) Obsidian. Now, why does this feel so familiar? Whew, this might take a while. Argh! Oh no! We’ll just cover that up. The secret to solving
all of life’s problems, is just putting cobblestone over it! Let’s make more obsidian! (laughs) (upbeat music) All right, 14 obsidian! And it only took me seven days! We’re outta here! Let’s see what this obsidian can do. Bedtime! (yawns) Goodnight, obsidian. – Good morning! – Whoop, a skele-bro! Stop swimming in my farm, ya heathen! (swooshes)
Ow! (swooshes)
Ow! (rumbles)
Uh-oh. (rumbles)
Ah, geez! This dumb skele-boob almost roached me! Unbelievable. Luckily I’ve got some steak from that cow that was eating our garden earlier. The circle of life is a beautiful thing. Okay, the garden’s gonna have to wait. Roach has a craving for an experience that’s a bit more Nether. (taps) (swooshes)
Ow! I’m okay! Wait, how is that cow still there? I thought I ate him! (villager sighs) The finishing touches, almost there! (intense music) Well, that was fun. Back to doing other things! Okay, let’s armor up! Oh, looking good, Roach! (screeches) Exploring the swamps, just like Shrek! Shout out to Shrek, that guy is cool. Pig! Hello, Porkchop! Sheep! Ugly sheep. Why do you guys all live
so far away from me? Don’t you, don’t you wanna be my friend? This sugar cane will go great on my farm! (rattles)
Ah, perfect! Now I can make home-grown Skittles! (rattles) Need a book and an enchanting table. Looks like we need to do
a little Redeco-roaching! (laughs) (group laughs) (rattles) Windows are for chumps! And I’m no chump. That’s Tanner! (taps) Mm, darkness. My best friend. (taps) Ah, there we go! Let’s make some magic happen. (zing) Screw you grass! I need your wool! Lend me your wool! – Roached! (sheep bleat) A whole family, gone in an instant. (sheep bleat)
All for wool. Don’t mind me, iron golem! Just stealing this Ominous banner. (sad music) Look how far we’ve come! This farm looks amazing! I can even fish in it now. Ah, nature. Gimme a bite! (splashes) You know, every day
“Fortnite” and “Minecraft” get closer and closer
to being the same thing. Who knows, maybe you’ll be able
to go into the Nether realm in “Fortnite” sometime soon! Potato! One potato can feed three
roaches for two hours! Get back in there, potato! I don’t need you after all. Happy birthday to the ground! (sheep bleat) Time to roach this conifer! You’ve lived a good thousand
year life, Mister Tree! But now, it’s time to pay your taxes. (taps) A little fence, for my little farm! Still cramped in here. (sighs) Another long day come to pass. Wait, did I forget to
turn off my furnaces? (mumbles) All righty, Roaches, looks like
the farm is doing amazingly, and our Nether portal
is ready for adventuring whenever I drum up the courage! (laughs) Should I go into
the Nether next time? Let me know in the comments! I hope you guys have a great day, and a happy Roach holidays! (bright upbeat music)

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